On intended consequences

I can barely contain myself. It’s too much. The excitement is just too much. I have been out! Not out as in the same four walks of the past two months but, you know, really out, or as out as you can get in these strange times. The Boyfriend has a thing for a fast car. She is very black, very shiny, very fast, very cool, with flashes of red, low bucket seats and suitably throaty roar, made throatier by a mate of his who has the enviable talent of making fast cars even faster. She has languished forlornly since the lockdown began. So to cheer her up, we decided last weekend to take her out for a blast… I mean a drive. Not one to pass up an opportunity for a photoshoot, I duly filled her surprisingly capacious boot with cushions and photography paraphernalia. And a picnic. Off we went.

The roads were mostly empty. The car alternately purred and roared. The Boyfriend was ecstatic. We found the perfect spot. We stopped. We ate. We soaked up the sun. The Boyfriend waited patiently with his eyes closed while I styled and photographed the cushions from every conceivable angle. Eventually we packed up and headed home. On returning, we cracked open ice-cold beers. It was the best beer I’ve ever tasted.

Later I shared the images I had taken with a graphic designer friend of mine. “Ah,” said he, “I see you are into postmodern photography.” Eh? Postmodern photography? Is there such a thing? It seems that there is. I’ve looked it up. And there was I just thinking that the cushions looked great out and about and against the green, particularly as nature is my major design inspiration. I had no idea I was actually doing a thing… with a name, and rather a grand one at that. He went on to suggest that it might be better to style them more conventionally, you know, in a room, on chairs and stuff so it’s more obvious what they are for. It is not bad advice in and of itself, but I content myself with the thought that you folks can recognise a cushion when you see one and I’m pretty sure that you’d know what to do with one or possibly two, even if you are a man.

In any case, the idea of being a postmodern photographer of cushions appeals, for of course it is exactly what I intended all along and in no way makes a virtue of necessity. How marvellous is that? Deserving of an ice-cold beer in celebration at the very least. Possibly with a lime…

Stay safe. Stay well.